STORY TIME: THE MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT OF MY LIFE

We all have our embarrassing moments and most times we avoid talking about them, however, when such stories are shared, they make us crack up. Today we will be having some fun with the story I am about to share. As you can tell by the title,  it's about the time I pooped on my self in public. I have a feeling I an been judged but before you take the piss, wait till you hear my story. 

On this day, I went to the office looking all good and classy with my 24 inches Brazilian hair, my pretty looking flay short skirt, a camisole with a million dollars looking blazer, and of course a pair of heels. I had my head so high because I was feeling myself, I am sure you know that feeling. After the day's work, I decided to go with my manager, who happened to be my uncle. I followed him majorly because I wanted him to pay for my transport fare, "selfish me!" anyway shout out to my uncle B.O. We started our journey but he said he was hungry, so we stopped somewhere to eat but the restaurant had no food at that time, they only had shawarma so he decided to take one. He offered me one but I said no because I wasn't hungry but as he started eating, I began to salivate, this characteristic is common among my mum and her siblings, they have a way of making you hungry while they eat, don't ask me why. Eventually, I asked him for a bit and of course, he gave me from his piece and that was it, I didn't drink or eat anything else. When he finished eating, we commenced our journey to a central spot then we went our different ways.

As I got into a bus going to my destination, that was the point I started feeling strange movements in my stomach, I played cool and hoped to compose myself till I get home,  when the bus eventually got filled, we commenced to our destination but I wasn't doing so well, I was feeling so bad, by the way, let me bring to your attention that this trip was supposed to be a  25 minutes or 30 minutes trip but something unusual happened this day, on getting to a particular area, we discovered the roads were blocked thanks to Lagos traffic. Omg! at this point, I was already sweating as I was trying to close my anus so no fart drops, you know Lagos commercial buses are so jam-packed however, I was trying to be the better person. After 40 minutes in traffic and I wasn't close to my destination, I decided to get off the bus in the middle of nowhere. I was so confused.

Luckily for me, I found a fuel station, I walked in and explain my situation to an attendant and he said they didn't have a toilet, at this point I was already farting. I left this place and I saw a big store opened with an elderly woman in it, I could tell she was a Christian and I could also tell what church she goes to because she had the picture of her pastor all over the place. I approached her and told her of the situation I was in but she responded to me cruelly, even though I was in pain I felt terrible at her response. At this point I felt something escaping from my anus so I started running, I got a motorbike to get me to a particular place but on our way there, we found a not so good looking hair stylist shop so I ask the bike to stop, at this point, I was already messed up. I ran into the shop and spoke with the owner who was a Muslim, I told her I menstruating and I got stained and asked if she can assist me, immediately she stood up, took me to her personal toilet and asked her workers to fetch me two buckets of water. I am sure you don't want to know what kind of hazard I had under my pant, it was very messy. Long story short, I cleaned my self and got rid of those things I knew I wouldn't be needing. As I left the toilet, I went back to her to say thank you, I gave her some money but she refused so I offered her and all her workers a drink which they accepted. After this event, I went home and slept like a queen. 

The next day, I gave my uncle the gist and his jaws dropped, he felt so sorry for me. The good thing was that I learned something new that day and that was never to judge the book by its cover. The first two persons I met that day refused to help when they knew I was in pain and the crazy thing was that it was very obvious through their voices and countenances that they were not going to help me. For God's sake, how can you tell me there is no toilet in a fuel station. I won't lie, when I saw the other woman, with the church banner all over her office, I felt my struggles were over, seeing that she is a Christian and a mother figure at that, little did I know that she was mean AF and this got me asking, what if she needed to use the toilet, what will she do? or if her daughter was in the same position as I was, what would be the solution she would prefer? I see how my mum who wasn't a churchgoer at that period treats other people in need, she goes out of her way most times to bring smiles and relief to those who come to her for help. Even if I can't tell whether the Muslim woman helped me because I said I was menstruating, I really don't care, she helped me anyway. This is somebody I will not ask for help on a normal day however, she was kind and loving enough to help me. 

In conclusion, from that day I stopped being racist, it doesn't matter if you are white, black, brown, Muslim or Christian as long as we speak a common language which is LOVE! You automatically become one of my family. By the way, if you are interested in learning how to make shawarma at home, stay tuned because I will be hitting you with that very soon.

I hope you enjoyed this storytime with me if so drop me a comment below and I will like to know some of your embarrassing moments.